100 Cute Facebook Statuses

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Cute School Facebook Status

  • What did you learn today? Student: Apparently not enough! We have to go back tomorrow!
  • The difference between school and life? In school, you’re taught a lesson and then given a test. In life, you’re given a test that teaches you a lesson.
  • don’t want to go back to prison, i mean school, i mean prison, i mean school, oh who am i kidding, school is prison and prison is school!
  • math grow up and solve your own problems
  • Teacher: I’m going to call your mother. Student: can you please tell their i forgot my lunch and that I my homework?
  • What’s the difference between Jail and School? Prisoners get better food than school kids do.
  • Love, (insert your name here)
  • How is it when ur in kindergarten u don’t want to take a nap, but in all the schools above elementary u would kill for 1?
  • If you are ready for school to be over press “like”
  • Fridays should happen more often.
  • Math use to be just 1+1=2 Now it’s (4x+2y)(5x-9y)
  • Teacher: I’m sick of how this class treats subs! When you have a sub you treat them how you treat me…
  • …wonders why homework use to be 1+1=2, and now its Y-2Y=4(X-7)Y=777-X-9-0987655>_< AGGGGGHH!!!my brain hurts!!!
  • Life is like Math… Once you are done with one problem, there is another one under it :)
  • Exams = Studying ~ Take the S T U away and you have Dying ~ Therefore ~ Studying = Preparing for death
  • Kids:then where is my pay check?
  • Has decided 2 start doing homework but not on days ending with a Y
  • aah. school, the place with teachers, homework, and DRAMA!!!
  • school wt today school i am late for school shit o wait its 8:00am thank God
  • why is it that we can’t talk about God in school but we have to learn about every other religion???
  • police man asked me where i was between 8 and 11 . I told them :
  • I look at the clock every few minutes and wish for school to be over…
  • Teacher: Tell me an example of a creature which can live on water as well as the land. Student: Frog. Teacher: Another example. Student: Another frog.

Funny Facebook Statuses

  • If you love something, let it go. If it comes back, it was meant to be. If it does not, hunt it down & kill it.
  • Boys will be boys as long as there are no girls in the picture.
  • Marriage is like going to a restaurant and order your choice from the menu, And then look at neighbouring table n wish you”d ordered that.
  • If life gives you questions, Google gives you answers.
  • Boys think of girls like books; if the cover doesn’t catch their eyes, they won’t even bother to read what’s inside.
  • Money can’t buy happiness, but it pays for internet, which is pretty much the same thing.
  • FACEBOOK STORY: Add as friend – Approve -> Write something on wall -Intro – Everyday chatting – Ask number phone – Messaging – Calling – Meeting – Express love – Make relationship status – Hangout – Misunderstanding – Fight – Break up – Unfriend – Block :( THE END
  • The police are on the way to arrest you for stealing my heart, hijacking my feelings, and driving me crazy.
  • If you are reading this, congrats you know how to read..
  • If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
  • Facebook is like a fridge. When you’re bored you keep opening and closing it every few minutes to see if there’s anything good in it.
  • I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives.
  • The zoo is a pretty safe place to fart.
  • I’m not getting older, I’m just becoming a classic..
  • I’m not 40, I’m eighteen with 22 years experience…
  • I may be old enough to know better, but I am STILL young enough to DO IT..
  • My life, My choices, My mistakes, My lessons, Not your business.
  • That awkward moment when somebody is doing dishes and you slowly put another dish in the sink.
  • Doctors finally figured out whats wrong with a boys brain; on the left side, there’s nothing right; and on the right side, there’s nothing left…
  • Tip to reduce weight, first turn your head to the left and then turn it to the right. Repeat this exercise every time you are offered something to eat.
  • Do you know the difference between a lady and a woman? A lady does what she’s told and a woman does what she dam well pleases!
  • Doing the moonwalk is the only way to look cool while wiping dog crap off your shoes.
  • I`m jealous of my parents, i`ll never have a kid as cool as theirs…
  • Can I take your picture?? I love to collect pictures of natural disasters..
  • I have finally figured out why I can’t lose this extra weight. The shampoo I use in the shower that runs down my body says, “for extra volume and body.”
  • I follow the quote, “Always be true to yourself” because I only lie to others!
  • Don`t you know it`s rude to talk while I`m interrupting?
  • I’m a smart person, I just do stupid things.
  • Thinks I feel great when I go to bed drunk. I wake up feeling crap. Obviously sleep is bad for you.
  • Some relationships are like tom and Jerry, they irritate each other, they tease each other, but they still can’t live without each other..
  • I am going to start cleaning my house. And by cleaning, i mean drinking beer and spraying everything with febreze.
  • That awkward moment when you keep talking & you don`t realize your friend walked away.

Hey you, looking at my status. Hi!٩(-̮̮̃•̃)۶

 

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